This Life Which is Wonderful and Evanescent

　　By Blanche Hartman

　　"One of the Buddha”s most significant teachings is impermanence. But actually that is just how things are—anything, anytime, anywhere. To live in harmony with this truth brings great happiness."

　　If you think about it, it”s awesomely, amazingly wonderful just to be alive! It”s a wonderful gift, and especially on a beautiful spring day like today. But it took me several years of meditation practice and a heart attack before I really got it that just to be alive is awesome. As I was walking out of the hospital I thought, "Wow! I could be dead. The rest of my life is just a gift." And then I thought, "Well, it always has been a gift from the very beginning and I never noticed it until it was almost gone."

　　I think it is true of many of us that we don”t notice what a gift it is just to be alive. How could we not notice

　　 Well, we sort of take it for granted. But this gift is not without its problems. One of these problems is actually the very thing that made me realize how awesome life is, what a gift it is and how much I appreciate it. That is the fact that life is evanescent, impermanent. It is precious because we can”t just take it for granted. When we realize this, we may wonder, "Well, if my life is a gift, how shall I use it, how shall I give it back, how shall I express my appreciation for it, or completely live this life which is wonderful and evanescent

　　"

　　In Zen Mind, Beginner”s Mind, Suzuki Roshi tells the story of the four horses. One of the horses starts to run just seeing the shadow of the whip, before it even touches him. The next one starts to run just having the whip touch the hair of its skin. The third horse starts to run when it really feels the pain of the whip on its skin. And the fourth horse doesn”t really get going until it feels the whip in the marrow of its bones.

　　What is this whip

　　 This whip is just that evanescence of life, just that teaching of impermanence. One of the Buddha”s most significant teachings is to hold up impermanence for us to see, but actually it is just how things are—anything, anytime, anywhere. There is a Pali chant which expresses this:

　　All things are impermanent

　　They arise and they pass away.

　　To live in harmony with this truth

　　Brings great happiness.

　　If you see how things are, "things as-it-is" as Suzuki-roshi used to say, you see that they arise and they pass away. The trick is to live in harmony with the way things actually are; our suffering comes from wanting things to be different than they are.

　　I don”t know why those of you who came today for the first time came. Why are you here at a Buddhist center

　　 Why is anyone here

　　 Why I”m here is that I began to notice that all things are impermanent, including myself. I came to practice the first time I almost died. The second time I almost died, I really came to recognize what a joy it is to be alive.

　　Maybe that”s like the fourth horse. I didn”t get it until it really got to the marrow. But maybe it”s not so bad to be the fourth horse because when it gets to the marrow, you”ve got it through and through. You don”t think, "Well, maybe just some things are impermanent, maybe, but not me. Maybe I”ll live forever, or maybe whatever I love will live for ever, or maybe impermanence is not really the truth."

　　So we may try to bargain with impermanence or get into denial about it. But somehow, if we”re lucky, we do come to understand "things-as-it-is" and that this is actually the life we are living. Then the question of how we live it becomes really urgent for us. It”s not going to last forever; I just have a limited amount of time to live in a way that feels satisfying to me, that feels right, that feels in consonance with the way things are. "To live in harmony with thi…

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