..續本文上一頁d the pain was even worse. For each of nine days, in the evening he would go to the teacher and, in great pain, ask to go home and the teacher would say, ”Just one more day and the pain will disappear”. It was completely beyond his expectations, that on the final day when he started the first sit of the morning, the pain did disappear! It did not come back. He could sit for long periods with no pain at all! He was amazed at how wonderful is this mind and how it can produce such unexpected results. So, you don”t know about the future. It can be so strange, even weird, completely beyond whatever you expect. Experiences like this give you the wisdom and courage to abandon all thoughts about the future, and all expectation as well.
最近，我聽說有一個人參加了一個十天的禅期，這是他首次。一天後，他坐得身體很痛，於是請求回家。老師說：「多留一天吧，我保證疼痛會消失。」這樣他便留下多一天，但疼痛卻加劇，於是他又再次想回家。老師重複說：「只多一天，疼痛便會消失。」他留至第叁天，但疼痛甚至更劇烈。在一連九天中，每天黃昏他都去找老師，十分痛苦地請求回家，但老師總是說：「只多一天，疼痛便會消失。」最後一天，卻完全超乎他所想像，在開始早上的第一坐時，痛楚竟真的消失了！痛楚不再出現。他可坐很久，一點痛楚也沒有！這個心竟是這麼奇妙，他感到驚訝，驚歎它居然能産生出如此出人意表的結果。所以，你不會預知到未來，未來可以是這麼的奇怪，甚至怪異，完全超乎你預料之外。像這樣的體驗會帶給你智慧和勇氣來抛棄所有有關未來的思慮，以及所有的期望。
When you”re meditating and thinking, ”How many more minutes are there to go
How much longer have I to endure all of this
”, then that is just wandering off into the future again. The pain could just disappear in a moment. The next moment might be the tree one. You just cannot anticipate what is going to happen.
打坐時若想著「還要坐多少分鍾？我還要忍受多久？」這其實只是又再回到未來。疼痛可以在一刹那後消失，下一刹那就可能會很順暢，你實在無法預知將會發生甚麼事。
When on retreat, after you have been meditating for many sessions, you may sometimes think that none of those meditations have been any good. In the next meditation session you sit down and everything becomes so peaceful and easy. You think ”Wow! Now I can meditate!”, but the next meditation is again awful. What”s going on here
你在密集禅期中一直坐了很多節，有時可能會認爲沒有一節是坐得好的。接著的一節，你開始坐，發覺竟然坐得很平靜、很舒適。你想，「哇！我現在會禅修了」，可是，下一節又再是這般糟糕。到底出了甚麼事？
The first meditation teacher I had told me something that then sounded quite strange. He said that there is no such thing as a bad meditation! He was right. All those meditations which you call bad, frustrating and not meeting your expectations, all those meditations are where you do the hard work for your ”pay cheque” ...
我第一個禅修老師告訴過我一句話，我當時聽得莫明其妙，他說，世上沒有很糟的禅坐這種事兒！他說得對，所有你認爲是很糟、失敗、未如理想的禅坐，其實都是「賺取工錢」所要付出的辛勞……。
It is like a person who goes to work all day Monday and gets no money at the end of the day. ”What am I doing this for
”, he thinks. He works all day Tuesday and still gets nothing. Another bad day. All day Wednesday, all day Thursday, and still nothing to show for all the hard work. That”s four bad days in a row. Then along comes Friday, he does exactly the same work as before and at the end of the day the boss gives him a pay cheque. ”Wow! Why can”t every day be a pay day
!”
這就好像一個人星期一上班，工作了一整天，但下班時沒得到工錢一樣。他想：「我做這些是爲了甚麼？」星期二，又工作了一整天，下班時仍是沒得到工錢，又是糟透的一天。星期叁一整天、星期四一整天，所有付出的辛勞，仍是沒有回報，一連四天都很糟。然後到星期五，仍是如前一樣地工作，然而，下班時，老板發給他一張工資支票。「哇！爲何不可以每天都是發薪日？！」
Why can”t every meditation be ”pay day”
Now, do you understand the simile
It is in the difficult meditations that you build up your credit, where you build up the causes for success. While working for peace in the hard meditations, you build up your strength, the momentum for peace. Then when there”s enough credit of good qualities, the mind goes into a good meditation and it feels like ”pay day”. It is in the bad meditations that you do most of the work.
爲何不可以每天都是「發薪日」？現在，你明白此譬喻嗎？你正是在艱苦的禅坐中積聚功勞、積聚成功因素。你在辛苦的禅坐中爲了得到平靜而努力，你是在積聚力量、積聚獲取平靜的動量。這樣，當優良的質素足夠了，心便會進入精彩的禅定，感覺就有如「發薪日」一樣。你正是在很糟的禅坐中耕耘哩。
At a recent retreat that I gave in Sydney, during interview time, a lady told me that she had been angry with me all day, but for two different reasons. In her early meditations she was having a difficult time and was angr…
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