..续本文上一页 We”re not talking about getting rid of the experience of getting hooked. We”re talking about when you get hooked, what do you do next

　　 There”s a choice. The Buddha teaches us that we are always at a crossroads, moment by moment. We have the intelligence to make a choice, so let”s educate ourselves about what the implications of our choices are. Let”s break it down. We could choose to open the wound further, creating more suffering for ourselves and others, or we could choose to heal the wound.

　　The question we usually ask ourselves at this crossroads is, What will soothe me in this moment

　　 The habitual response is that what will soothe me is to get what I want, to have my needs met, to get even, to straighten this all out so I come out with what I need. But we have seen what this choice leads to. We need to cultivate that other choice.

　　The choice I have been talking about doesn”t preclude resolving conflicts where parties have been in the wrong. If someone breaks a contract with you, for example, that all have entered into consciously and in good faith, I”m not saying you wouldn”t address that breach. Leaving it unaddressed would not be soothing the waters. The precedent would be set, and the irritation would just grow and grow. So there are things that definitely have to be addressed, which is where non-violent communication comes in. You don”t just bite the hook. You don”t just fly off the handle. You somehow interrupt the momentum.

　　There is something you can do before you speak and act. Sometimes that before might have to take a long time. I”ve given the advice many times to students, advice I use myself, that if you”re really outraged, type out the e-mail or write the letter, then don”t send it. Fold it up, put it in a certain place, then look at it a day or two later. Chances are you won”t send that letter. Nobody ever sends that letter. You could rewrite it, but even then you might not send the second letter either, and if you wait long enough the natural intelligence will come in. The knee-jerk reaction is not based on intelligence. It”s based on obscured intelligence. The results of this reaction are all too obvious.

　　As you”re acting, you could ask, “Have I ever responded in this way before

　　” If the answer is, “Yes, I always respond this way. This movie is a rerun,” then you”re acting unconsciously. You aren”t even acknowledging that you”re doing it again and getting the same result. It”s so strange, really, when you think about it. I don”t think we needed the Buddha to come along and point this out to us, but somehow 2,500 years later, here we are. It”s crazy.

　　Nowadays, we have instant access to news and sounds and images of all the wars and violence happening all over the world. We can see all around us vivid public demonstrations of how biting the hook and getting swept away does not yield good results. It is not adding up to happiness or peace. If you need an example of how the usual approach to settling the score doesn”t work, just look around.

　　Unfortunately, when we see all this suffering, we want fast results. Once again we might act on impulse and out of emotional reactivity, but if we look at the many examples of people trying to heal and settle the score in the intelligent way, we see that it takes time. The results are slow in coming, but from the larger perspective of natural intelligence and openness and warmth, the process is as important as the result. You are creating the future of the planet by how you work with injustice. You may not see it before your eyes immediately, but you are repaying a debt.

　　Settling the score in the Buddhist sense is letting the buck stop here, because the pain you are feeling allows you to pay back some karmic debt. For what

　　 You don”t know and it doesn”t really matter. All you need to know is that the future is wide open and you are about to create it by what you do. You are either going to create more debt or get out of debt. You could start to pay off the cosmic credit card.

《Choosing Peace》全文阅读结束。