The Real World

　　by Ajahn Sumedho

　　This is adapted from a teaching given by Ajahn Sumedho during the 1988 winter monastic retreat at Amaravati.

　　Tonight we will once again reflect on the way life is as a human being. Birth in the human form means there is a feeling of separateness, consciousness works within the limitations of the body, so each one of us has to see things from that particular position. Right now I”m sitting right here, I have to see things from this position. Sister Kalyana is way over there in the corner, and Anagarika Bill is here in front - but no matter how far away or close, there is this sense of pision or separation. Consciousness is the discriminative function of the mind, so if we attach to consciousness as our identity, there is always the sense of isolation and separation.

　　There are romantic views of finding someone to have communion with. There”s a longing in all human beings for some kind of communion or sense of oneness, yet that is a totally impossible thing to have on the level of the discriminative mind - which is where most people seek it. If I am this body, this consciousness, then how can I ever be one with anything

　　 Even though momentarily there may be a sense of oneness - through physical union or emotional unity - there is also separation, because that which comes together must separate. This is the inexorable law. If one is attached to an idea of union, unity or communion, and one feels a moment of it, that conditions the sense of isolation; there is always a sense of loss.

　　So the more we seek communion and oneness in terms of body and consciousness, the more we feel alienated and lonely. Even when there isn”t physical or emotional aloneness, we can still feel lonely, because of the existential problem of ignorance - the illusion of separation which is created through identification with consciousness.

　　One can be sitting in a room full of people and feel totally alone. In fact, I think one of the loneliest experiences of my life was when, at about age 24, I went to New York City to live. I was surrounded by millions of people, yet I felt so lonely. Where did the loneliness come from

　　 It was due to the longing, the attachment to the belief in ”the real world” and the feeling of not having entered "the real world” in the same way others had. I didn”t realise that everyone had the- same problem, actually. I used to think it was a personal flaw in my character, that somehow I was a misfit and that everyone else fitted in - only to find that most people felt that they were misfits.

　　This sensory world doesn”t fit us, really. It”s a kind of passage that we take in order to learn a lesson. (Hopefully we will learn it!) We don”t fit into these roles - we are not realty people; you are not really women; you are not really men. These forms are like costumes, they”re temporary things that we have to learn to live with. We have to learn how to accept them and know them. We have to learn from this suffering, this sense of alienation that comes from ignorance.

　　It probably starts from the moment you”re born, from the time you are thrown out into the world. Babies usually cry when they are born - they don”t come out laughing. I”ve never heard of one doing that! You are one with your mother, and then the umbilical cord is cut. That is the end of chat relationship and then you are a separate being; that must be very traumatic for every baby. You see so many people longing to get back into that relationship again. We”d like a mother to nurse us and take care of us, protect us, keep us warm and all that. I”ve seen that myself - wanting to have some nice warm womb to crawl back into, some safe place where I”ll be protected and be told, ”I love you dear, forever, no matter what you do, and everything”…

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