Affectionate Living

　　by Ajahn Viradhammo

　　A talk by Ajahn Viradhammo given at Bodhinyanarama on 13 December 1998

　　Good evening. It is nice to see so many people here to use this lovely space to sit quietly and contemplate Dhamma. We have just finished a ten day retreat with about thirty lay people and the monastic community. It is a privilege to live without competition, worldly things or the usual struggle of life. At times like these, one can just observe the way things are. One sees spaciousness, and a trusting and moral environment where silence is encouraged and the beauty of nature is present. To be in this environment is a great privilege.

　　What one develops in a period of time like that is a strong sense of community and of relating to people. There”s a common activity because the life of community is cooperative not competitive. There is no ”I want to get to nibbana before you and if you get ahead of me I”m going to trip you.” I know that if I work on myself, practice in this particular way, live morally and uphold the principles of the retreat and the teaching, then that encourages you to do the same thing. And if you do that too it encourages me. There”s a reciprocity of encouragement, affection and aspiration.

　　This of course is something that is often lacking in a society which is geared to competition, money and ease, where life is a vicarious existence of watching rugby games or other forms of entertainment. Community life is I think an art form which is being much lost these days. It is hard to do if one has been conditioned to inpiduality. I certainly was. I had my own room. My brother had his own room. I had my records. He had his records. If he touched my records he”d be finished. The life of community is something that I have learned by being a Buddhist monk. As you know, we chant ”Sangha vandeh / I revere the Sangha”. In Buddhism ”Sangha vandeh/ I revere the Sangha” is seen to be the ”Sangha of Enlightened Beings”. Where do you find one of those these days

　　 But if you bring Sangha to the ordinariness of life, you contemplate community.

　　To me community implies a sense of affection for one”s place, for the trees, for the water one uses, for the air one breathes, for the food one eats, for governance, for the street one uses, for one”s neighbour, for the shoemaker, for the greengrocer and so on. A Buddhist culture implies the sense of developing community by being responsible for all these very real things.

　　To live and work in community requires us to give. One of the great virtues of a Buddhist culture is dana, giving. Sometimes there can be a form of spiritual materialism, where giving is linked to a better material status in the next life. We need to think about what dana, or generosity, actually implies. What does metta, the idea of kindness and compassion imply other than being nice to my dog or my kids

　　 Like community, metta also implies a deep commitment to affection at a very real and pervasive level. Affection for one”s roads, for the air. For New Zealand. This monastery of course brings that up. When you come to this environment you notice the affection; affection for architecture, for workmanship, for a path which is laid out with beautiful stones you can walk along, There is also a sense of responsibility for the overall harmony of the community. For me to see it”s not for you to make me happy but rather for me to try to participate with affection in your life, my own life and in our community life in order to create harmony. That”s what an elder does.

　　The school of Buddhism this monastery is a part of is called ”Theravada” which means ”The Way of the Elders”. Of course traditionally that means the elder members of the ordained Sangha who have much wisdom and so on. All of us are moving towa…

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