..續本文上一頁showed up, virtually all of them bringing a letter of recommendation with them. After interviewing all of them, the manager finally hired a young man who had not brought a letter. When others expressed their surprise, the manager explained, "Everyone else brought only one letter of recommendation, but this young man brought three letters. When he walked into my office, he gently shut the door behind him; this was a letter describing his cautiousness. During his conversation with me, his voice was clear and his responses were logical; that was a letter telling me about his intelligence. When an older person came into my office, he quickly stood up; that was a letter telling me about his courteousness. His three letters of recommendation revealed themselves in his behavior; everyone else”s letters were merely written on paper."
從這故事看來，平常就養成恭敬長者的習慣，鍛煉出不卑不亢的應對的談吐，是做人做事成功的基礎。人是社會的動物，不能離群而索居。如何與人和睦相處，並獲得發展自我潛能的機會，以服務人群，這是一生都要努力的課程；這個課程，開始得愈早愈澈底，將來的際遇也愈順利。因此，兒童的啓蒙教育，應以孝悌爲先，培養他們對父母師長的恭敬心；孩子長大跨入社會，自然就會是個有禮貌的人，這是成功地展開人際關系的第一步。
From this story, we can see that developing the habit of respecting our elders and speaking in a way that is neither lowly nor overbearing will ensure our success in dealing with people and matters. People are social creatures who cannot live in total isolation. We must seriously learn how to dwell in harmony with people in order to develop our own potentials so we can help the common good. This is the lesson of a lifetime, and the sooner and the more thoroughly we learn it, the smoother our life will be. Hence, early childhood education should stress filial piety and brotherhood first, teaching children to respect their parents. When they grow up and go out into the society, they will naturally be courteous and well-mannered; that is the first step in relating successfully to other people.
雖然也有人說：“大行不顧細節，何必這麼拘謹呢？”但這只是說，小禮儀有時可以不必那麼執著，不表示我們的內心可以不恭敬師長。恭敬應該發自內心，但是每個人內心的看法不同，標准也有異，有時就會遇到難題。時下的孩子，思想大都很活潑，也都很能言善辯；你若教他恭敬師長，他很可能反過來告訴你，這位老師或長輩言行如何如何，言下之意是他們覺得這位師長不值得尊敬。他們往往反問你；“你教我表現得恭敬，豈不是教我作假，裝兩面人嗎？這不誠實。”不少家長啞口無言，不知怎麼回答好。
Some people may say, "In doing great deeds, one should not be hampered by fine details, why should we be so rigid
" This is only saying that we don”t always have to be too attached to minor points of etiquette; it doesn”t mean we can be disrespectful to our teachers and elders in our minds. Respect should come from the heart. However, everyone”s outlook and standard is different, so sometimes we run into problems. Children of today are very liberal in their outlook and very good at arguing their own views. If you tell them to respect their teachers and elders, they might respond by telling you certain things about their teacher or elder, implying that the person is not worth respecting. They often ask you, "If you ask me to show respect, aren”t you just asking me to put on a false front
It”s not for real." Many parents are left speechless; they don”t know how to reply.
所以我們爲人父母師長的，除了要時常躬自反省，改進自身的品行外，還得灌輸孩子們正確的概念。什麼呢？我們發自內心來尊敬叁種人：第一是品德比自己好的人；第二是年紀比自己大的人；第叁是職位比自己高的人。第一種人，相信誰都會認爲值得尊敬；第二、第叁種人，不管他的品行如何，還是應該尊敬。爲什麼？俗語說：“人生不如意，十常八九。”可謂苦多于樂，災患多于平安；想想看，這位長輩，要奮鬥到現在，才能夠活著成爲比我們年長的人，難道不值得尊重？這位老師或長官，要努力到現在，才有今天的身份和職位，難道不值得尊重？何況每個人都有機會輪到做尊長的時候，“要怎麼收獲，先怎麼栽”。這麼開解給孩子聽，而能發自內心去敬老尊賢了。千萬不要以權威去強迫孩子虛應事故，讓他戴個禮貌的假面具，而成爲僞君子；也不要縱容孩子，讓他長成一個不知天高地厚的狂妄小子。
As parents, teachers, and elders, not only should we always reflect upon ourselves and improve our own character and conduct, we should try to teach children the correct way of thinking, which is that we should bring forth heartfelt respect for three kinds of people: (1) those who are more virtuous than we are, (2) those who are older than we are, and (3) those who have higher position than we do. I think probably everyone will agree that the first kind of person deserves respect. …
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