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　　言语应对，也是古人很注重的启蒙教育。除了恭敬外，谈吐也要大方，音调更应高低适中；尤其要避免用尖锐拔高的音调讲话，令人感觉你在卖弄本事或争论。

　　In ancient times, people considered proper manners in speaking and interacting with others an important part of a child”s education. In addition to being respectful, we should speak with others in a forthright manner. We should use a moderate tone of voice, and avoid speaking in a sharp, high-pitched voice, which gives people the feeling that we are showing off or arguing.

　　与任何人交谈 ，若是一个劲儿地高谈阔论或喧哗嘻笑，都会予人狂妄之感；反之，若是一味嗫嗫嚅嚅、嘀嘀咕咕，又会令人看轻和不耐；至于谈话中，不时左顾右盼，更显出轻浮和无知。何况是在尊长前呢？但是如果尊长的听力不好，就必须大声讲话，但不要流于尖锐。

　　If we keep talking and laughing and making a lot of noise, people will feel we are hyperactive. On the other hand, if we always mumble and whisper, others will feel contempt and impatience. We should not be looking here and there as we speak, because that gives the impression of being frivolous and scatter-brained. How much the less should we do these things in the presence of our elders! If our elders are hard of hearing, we should speak loudly, but not sharply.

　　声调之外，还要记得配合以适当的礼仪。长辈问话时，我们如果仍坐着不起身，长辈势必得弯腰低头；这样子，不但谈话效果不佳，长辈也会感觉累，这也是不恭敬，不懂事理。

　　In addition to modulating the tone of voice, we ought to show the proper courtesy. If we remain seated when our elders ask us a question, they will be forced to bend down to speak to us. Not only is that a poor posture for speaking, but it will tire them out; that shows a lack of respect and understanding on our part.

　　所谓“趋”，是很快地小步向前走。你可能想：晋见长辈要这么走法，岂不是太矫揉造作了吗

　　这听起来确是奇怪 ，其实那只是真诚恭谨心的自然流露。

　　When we are going to meet our elder, we should approach quickly with small steps. It might seem affected, but actually it”s a way of showing our earnest reverence.

　　古时候的中国，民风醇厚，大部分人对父母师长 ，都有一种孺慕的心态；不但乐于效劳，亦且乐见长辈。因此晋见长辈时，生怕让长辈久等，想快，又怕大步走或跑步会惊动长辈，所以“其进也趋趋”；告退离去时，虽然依恋不舍，想留，又怕太烦扰长辈，所以“其行也迟迟”：举止进退，总是这样子小心翼翼，合情又合理。所谓“发乎情，止乎礼”，这哪里是肤浅冒失的人可以了解的呢？又哪里是虚伪拘泥的人可以学步的呢？

　　In ancient China, when the moral culture was well-developed, most people would regard their teachers and elders as fondly as they would their own parents. Not only were they eager to serve them, but they were delighted to see them. When they had an appointment with an elder, they didn”t want to keep their elder waiting, so they would go quickly. Yet they feared that if they took large strides or ran up to their elder, they would startle him, so they approached with quick, light steps. When it was time to leave, they could hardly bear to go, but they didn”t want to bother their elder too long, so they departed with reluctant steps. They were that cautious in every move they made, always observing courtesy and reason. They acted from their hearts, but restrained themselves with propriety. How could those who are shallow and rash understand this

　　 How could those who are phony or rigid learn this

　　我们人外在的一举一动 ，都是内在感情的反应和表达；当内在感情的反应和表达太过或不足时，就必须用礼仪来纠正和约束，使举止在合情之余，亦能合理，所以说“礼者，理也”。但是如果一味拘守礼仪，流于形式，已缺乏那份真挚的情感，那倒又不如有真情感而不懂礼仪的人了！

　　Our every gesture and move is a response to and an expression of our inner feelings. If those responses and expressions are excessive or deficient, they must be restrained or corrected by the rules of propriety. Then our actions will accord with courtesy as well as with reason. Propriety is itself defined as reason. However, if we adhere too rigidly to the rules of propriety and get caught up in the external form, while lacking true feeling, we are even worse than the person who has true feeling but isn”t familiar with the rules of propriety.

　　有很多家庭或学校的规矩也很严谨，父母师长要求孩子要做个有教养的绅士淑女；但仔细考察，你可能发觉，其实很多绅士淑女不但虚伪，而且自私自利。如何教导孩子们合情又合理，那就须要从伦理教育着手；而伦理教育，不但要开始得愈早愈好，更要父母师长以身作则。

　　There are many strict households and schools where parents and teachers expect children to behave like well-brought-up "gentlemen and ladies." But if you observe these children closely, you might find that many of…

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